Not exactly the update I promised…

A bunch of reviews that refused to get written combined with the emergence of an obsessional new project to render my usual B-Fest roundup both irrelevant and impracticable.  Still, a couple of the projected B-Fest reviews were sufficiently well advanced to be worth resurrecting once I got back into the swing of things:

 

Attack of the Puppet People (1958), in which a startlingly good Bert I. Gordon movie is undercut somewhat by insisting upon sci-fi when it ought to be straight-up fantasy instead…

Drunken Tai Chi (1984), which is a charming light comedy about assassination and post-traumatic stress disorder…

Journey to the Seventh Planet (1962), in which the makers of Reptilicus return to Denmark to rework The Angry Red Planet

The Lair of the White Worm (1988), in which Ken Russell decides that an obscure Bram Stoker novel could use a little extra sex and blasphemy…

The Lost Missile (1958), in which an unconscionable orgy of stock footage gives way to an unexpectedly bleak and sober meditation on the end of the world…

RoboCop (2014), which didn’t suck anywhere near as much as I thought it was going to…

and…

Thomasine and Bushrod (1973), which wasn’t supposed to be the blaxploitation Bonnie and Clyde, but inevitably gets passed off as that anyway.

 
 
 

El Santo rules the wasteland-- and also 1000 Misspent Hours and Counting.


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A mean and gritty western

BandidosYou have not been getting enough pasta in your cinematic diet! To remedy that, track down Bandidos, a spaghetti western that has real spice in the sauce.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.


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A good High Priest is hard to find

Ahem.

This was actually supposed to be my second entry in the last Roundtable, but when I lose a DVD somewhere in the house, it stays lost…

TMG44-yousefbey2b.

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THE MUMMY’S GHOST (1944)

In which John Carradine is sent to Mapleton, Massachusetts, to clean up the mess made by Turhan Bey, and ends up fouling the nest even more thoroughly.

Meanwhile, Kharis decides that he’s had enough of High Priests interfering in his love-life…

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Liz Kingsley is the insane genius behind And You Call Yourself a Scientist!


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Hitchcock in space

LifepodThe movie Lifepod takes Alfred Hitchcock’s Lifeboat and gives it a sci-fi twist. It’s an interesting idea, but director Ron Silver is no Hitchcock.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.


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A Yahrzeit Candle for Tío Jess

Reviews for the Anniversary of Jess Franco's Death
Yahrzeit? OK, OK, so Jess Franco wasn’t Jewish. That’s OK: neither am I. Still, this is the one-year anniversary of his death, so in his honor I’m posting reviews from two of the last — how shall I put it? — unambiguously good years of his film-making life.

1965
Miss Muerte/The Diabolical Dr. Z — often called Franco’s best film.

1966
Cartes sur table/Attack of the Robots — Franco’s first movie with Eddie Constantine.
Residencia para Espías/Golden Horn — Franco’s last movie with Eddie Constantine, who really looks better in black & white.

Will Laughlin is the Braineater.


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A different kind of sick horror

The CarrierThe independent horror movie The Carrier is in several ways unlike any other horror movie you can think of. But ultimately it won’t be to everybody’s taste.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.


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Golan and Globus declare war!

P.O.W. The EscapeJumping in on the 1980s fad of showing Vietnam vets in a more heroic light, P.O.W. The Escape gives David Carradine the opportunity to show Rambo a thing or two.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.


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Can people be beautiful animals?

Animals Are Beautiful PeopleSix years before filming the international box office smash The Gods Must Be Crazy, South African filmmaker Jamie Uys made Animals Are Beautiful People, a nature documentary that served as an interesting warm up for what was to follow.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.


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Be careful what you wish for

IT'S ALIVE! The B-Masters are Back from Beyond

DON72-maggots2b

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In honour of our resurrected blog, a resurrected review of a film about a resurrection:

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DEAD OF NIGHT (1972)

When Andy Brooks gets home from Vietnam, his family and friends can’t help but notice that he is somehow “different”.

They don’t know the half of it…

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Liz Kingsley is the insane genius behind And You Call Yourself a Scientist!


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Gentlemen, we shouldn’t have rebuilt her

IT'S ALIVE! The B-Masters are Back from Beyond

Running DelilahThe ABC network must have really loved the bionic man and woman series they aired in the 1970s, since years later they whipped up the television movie Running Delilah. It’s more or less the same idea, but nowhere as fun as it was before.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.


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