I can claim some expertise in the juvenile-oriented direct-to-video fare produced in Romania through the late ’90s (and just into the 21st century) by any combination of Full Moon Studios, PulsePounders!, Kushner-Locke, Inc., Castel Film, and CanaRom Productions. So sit up and take notice when I say that Train Quest (2001) is the most banal, paint-by-numbers production to come out of the combined efforts of those usual suspects.

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