It seems fitting that our final full review of 2008 features a zombie gorilla, an ax-swinging cutie, see-thru sari rain dances, and kungfu fights in the graveyard, because that’s pretty much everything that defined 2008 for me.
BHOOT KE PECHHE BHOOT
Bhoot ke Pechhe Bhoot starts with couple en route to spooky house, a trip highlighted by the requisite animated lightning that appears so often in pretty much every Indian horror film that, at this point, I think Indian filmmakers are required by parliament to give it top billing. While the couple pokes around in the mansion, there’s a puff of ninja smoke in the graveyard outside, and suddenly there appears…is that…is that a zombie gorilla??? Yes, a zombie gorilla appears. Son of a bitch. And, umm, and…well, he’s got sparklers for fingertips. Huh. How about that? So far, Bhoot ke Pechhe Bhoot is the greatest movie ever. As the couple continues poking around inside the house, the zombie gorilla appears out of nowhere in the same room, which causes the woman to, take a guess: A) she screams and runs back to the car, as any sane human would do, or B) she reacts as if a sad little puppy has just wandered in, walking toward it with that “how ya doin’, little fella?” tone of voice. Anyone who reacts to a zombie gorilla appearing out of thin air by cooing and walking up to caress it really deserves to get what happens to this woman, which is choked by a zombie gorilla while her boyfriend stands by making “Nah, I think it’ll be OK. He’ll tire himself out” gestures, once again reacting as if this was a puppy humping his girlfriend’s leg rather than a damned zombie gorilla that appeared out of nowhere to wave around sparklers and choke a woman.
#1 by lyzard on December 22, 2008 - 7:46 pm
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But is the snake all right?
#2 by KeithA on December 23, 2008 - 1:01 am
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I think I can safely bet that the snake that actually sustains the beating was emblazoned with “Made in China” on its rubber belly.
#3 by lyzard on December 23, 2008 - 6:12 pm
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Phew!
You know, I’ve been sitting here wrestling with an uncomfortable feeling that if confronted by a zombie gorilla, I *would* react with, “Aw, how ya doin’, little fella?”, or something equally asinine…
#4 by JessicaR on December 24, 2008 - 5:10 am
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Kind of like how if I came across a mountain lion, tiger, or any big cat I would be immediately and horribly mauled to death as I would be unable to control my urge to scratch it behind the ears and rub its belly.