We cannot face more porn…

Agent 69 Jensen: In the Sign of Scorpio (1977), in which the world’s horniest international supervillain tries to steal the formula for a substance that could replace oil as the planet’s primary fuel source, and only a bunch of incompetent boobs can stop him…

Agent 69 Jensen: In the Sign of Sagittarius (1978), in which the incompetent boobs return to battle an Albanian superspy who is incomprehensibly indistinguishable from a Cossack, but mostly just get sidetracked banging a bunch of sexy girls…

Children of Men (2006), in which nobody’s had a kid in eighteen years, and the world is teetering on the brink of collapse because of it…

District 9 (2009), in which aliens pick the single worst place on the entire planet to settle in on a permanent basis…

Goth Kill (2009), in which a Satanic sorcerer’s bid to make himself a prince of the underworld doesn’t go quite according to plan…

In the Sign of the Gemini (1975), in which two record company bosses embroil themselves in a series of ridiculous misadventures while competing to sign a popular cabaret singer, and there’s an enormous amount of screwing…

In the Sign of the Lion (1976), in which two batty old ladies who used to be the hottest thing in town cause a monumental scandal by publishing a novelization of their youthful sexual adventures under their young cousin’s name…

In the Sign of the Taurus (1974), in which a filthy-minded old count turns his village upside down by making the bequest of his property contingent upon the birth of an illegitimate child within a narrow window of opportunity…

and…

Six-String Samurai (1998), in which Buddy Holly battles the Grim Reaper (who’s really more of a Grim Shredder in the present context) for rulership of a post-apocalyptic America.



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