Betcha can’t guess what the secret is!
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FROM THE VAULT
- The New Vampire on the Block — posted by KeithA on October 20, 2007
- That sinking feeling — posted by lyzard on June 7, 2014
- Bela goes ape — posted by lyzard on December 18, 2009
- An Unexpected Theme Emerges — posted by El Santo on May 31, 2023
- Bits and pieces — posted by lyzard on July 7, 2016
Pages
- About the Cabal
- Full Index of Reviews
- Roundtables
- 01: Brainathon ’99
- 02: Bangs'n'Whimpers
- 03: Post-Apocalypso
- 04: Review All Monsters
- 05: Pretty Mad Scientists
- 06: Tainted Love
- 07: Days of Future Past
- 08: Secret Santa
- 09: Catch a Throwing Star
- 10: Four-Color Features
- 11: Big Bugs
- 12: Fish With Bicycles
- 13: Go Go Go-Go Boys!
- 14: paLe IMITATIONS
- 15: We're Gonna Need a Bigger Roundtable
- 16: Whoa… Deja Vu.
- 17: Month of the Living Dead
- 18: B-Masters Beach Party
- 19: Kinji Fukasaku – The Man No Genre Could Tame.
- 20: Home Video Holocaust – The Video Nasties
- 21: Father Dearest: Who's Your Daddy?
- 22: So Sorry…
- 23: Back to the Well
- 24: Another Month of the Living Dead
- 25: The Ottoman Empire Strikes Back
- 26: Rubber Soul
- 27: Shhhhhh
- 28: Month of the Alternative Living Dead
- 29: On Time & Under Budget
- 30: These Kids Today…
- 31: Mea maxima culpa
- 32: Stingathon ’09
- 33: 10,000 B.S.
- 34: Foot Notes
- 35: Don’t Touch That Dial!
- 36: He Conquered the World
- 37: Secret Santa’s Revenge
- 38: At the Movies of Madness
- 39: They Might Be Giants
- 40: The Other Elizabeth Taylor
- 41: The Dark Guys of London
- 42: Falling Stars
- 43: To Be or Not To Be! (Pilot Error)
- 44: Teeth and Tentacles
- 45: Brunoween
- 46: Howl of the B-Masters
- 47: It’s Alive!
- 48: Bad, Black and Beautiful
- 49: Don’t Quit Your Day Job
- 50: B-Mentia 15
- 51: Quelle Horreur!
- 52: Carradine, Thou Wayward Son!
- 53: Tall, Dark and Gruesome
- 54: Pets Gone Wild
- 55: The Bad Place
- 56: From The Bible To Barbarella
- 57: A Fistful Of Pennies
- 58: Hello, Dolly
- 59: No, Not That One!
- 60: Dr Terror’s House Of Honours
- 61: WTF!?
- 62: In The Key Of B
- 63: The Forgotten Dawn Of Horror
- 64: The Most Dangerous Roundtable
- 65: Room For One More
- 66: Were-WHAT?
- 67: The China Anniversary Syndrome
- 68: The China Anniversary Syndrome: Part 2
- 69: The China Anniversary Syndrome: Part 3
- 70: The China Anniversary Syndrome: Part 4
- The Links We Love
#1 by Jen S on March 23, 2011 - 11:44 am
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Could it involve….SATAN?!
That’s actually a really friendly looking Satan goat. Look at him smile! “See, we’re evil, but not so baaaaad!”
#2 by Cabal on March 23, 2011 - 12:38 pm
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Given the visual, I’m going to guess it’s the secret family recipe for extra-spicy curried goat?
#3 by KeithA on March 23, 2011 - 2:25 pm
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Jen is right, that devil goat is giving off a distinctly happy vibe. He looks sort of like Donald Sutherland.
And while this is indeed bad, at least it’s the cover of a crappy dvd for a budgetless movie. Have you ever seen the cover of Iron Maiden’s “Dance of Death?”
http://sleevage.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/iron_maiden-dance_of_death.jpg
That’s the product of a multi-platinum band that rakes in millions, still plays massive stadium shows, and has the money to hire pretty much any designer they want. And they went with a cover made by someone’s kid who just got a pirated copy of 3D Poser from 1996.
#4 by Mark on March 23, 2011 - 2:55 pm
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Hope it’s not beastility, the goat looks suspiciously happy.
#5 by Andy on March 23, 2011 - 3:28 pm
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You’d be happy too if you were a goat with a human mouth.
#6 by Naomi on March 23, 2011 - 7:25 pm
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The pentagram is inverted and not circumscribed, so… they’re secret Pythagoreans?
#7 by MatthewF on March 24, 2011 - 7:46 am
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“Holy crap my dad’s a goat!”
That’s the secret right?
#8 by The Rev. on March 24, 2011 - 4:32 pm
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Awww, what a happy little goaty-goat! So happy to EAT YOUR SOUL
I can see what they were going for; they just didn’t do it very well. I think I like this one better than the other entries in this series. Of course, I think goats are incredibly cute, so I might be biased.
#9 by Amber on March 24, 2011 - 7:40 pm
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I was going to point out that in no way does the rosary-like thing on the cover actually correspond to the way the beads are arranged on a real rosary. But then I realized- that’s what makes it Satanic!
Or maybe “We don’t know how in the world to make a rosary” is the dreaded secret.
PS- Love the goat.
#10 by DamonD on March 25, 2011 - 6:58 am
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At least it’s a fairly colourful and interesting cover, which makes it a damn sight better than many of the other mud-brown photo montages.
#11 by James Hutchings on March 28, 2011 - 2:39 am
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I think it’s that they’re Catholic. If you look closely you can see rosary beads.
#12 by KeithA on March 28, 2011 - 2:07 pm
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That’s a rosary? Man, I thought it was roulette wheel balls. “Satan always puts his money on black…masses!”