Archive for category New Reviews

Losing my religion

Pray TVPray TV was a piece of s**t from beginning to end… Oh god, it was the worst movie you’ve ever seen.” – Dabney Coleman, 2016 interview.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.

The grand-daddy of ’em all…

 

 


 

 

 
THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME (1932)
 
…in which a professional big-game hunter keeps a long-overdue date with Karma…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Liz Kingsley is the insane genius behind And You Call Yourself a Scientist!

If it were only this fun in Mayberry

SavagesDespite being confined to American television network standards in the early 1970s, Savages all the same manages to be an above average Dangerous Game retread.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.

I share Cher with you

ChastityWhat’s wrong with Chastity? Quite a bit, though there are a few good things to be uncovered in the otherwise extreme expanse of mire.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.

FOR GOD’S SAKE, SAVE THE BUDGERIGARS!!!!

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CRASH LANDING (1958)

…in which double engine-failure over the Atlantic Ocean threatens the lives of a small mongrel dog and two dozen budgies.

Oh…and some people, I guess…

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I have also copied over Jet Storm (1959) (apologies for the tasteless timing on that one) and Jet Over The Atlantic (1959).

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(What can I tell you? I’ve been in a disastrous mood lately…)

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I have further copied over Wolf Blood (1925), The Mysterious Island (1929) and Cobra Woman (1944); and there’s a new Et Al. post, in which decade-old horror steps aside to allow me clear some older thrillers and dramas off my hard drive.

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Enjoy!

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Liz Kingsley is the insane genius behind And You Call Yourself a Scientist!

Read this review and love it

Take This Job And Shove ItAfter hitting it big in Airplane!, actor Robert Hays next appeared in Take This Job And Shove It, a comedy while not being raucous, entertains all the same by being extremely amiable.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.

“Miracle” whipped

Miracle Of The White StallionsThe Disney movie Miracle Of The White Stallions is oddly more geared for adult audiences rather than children, but will equally bore both age groups.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.

Oh, hell… Is THAT jerk back again?

Unsurprisingly after all this time, we’ve got some catching up to do.  First, what’s actually new:

 

Annihilation (2018), in which something out of space renders Florida even more screwed up…

Battle Beyond the Stars (1980), in which the preferred way to rip off Star Wars is once again to rip off The Seven Samurai even more…

The Beguiled (1970), in which Clint Eastwood has a complicated convalescence

The Dragon Lives Again (1977), in which the afterlife needs heroes, too…

Five Element Ninjas (1981), in which only a ninja can destroy a ninja, even in China…

The Shape of Water (2017), or La Cuve de Noces

Truth or Dare? A Critical Madness (1986), in which you never realize how much time people in cheap movies spend driving around until some sick bastard gives that activity its own theme song…

and…

What We Do in the Shadows (2014), in which the only thing more aggravating than having three roommates is having three roommates who live forever.

 

And now here’s a bunch of other stuff that I was unable to announce here due to technical difficulties:

 

The Blood Waters of Dr. Z (1971), in which the first step on the road to World Domination is obviously to turn yourself into a catfish…

Centurion (2010), or The Hills Wear Woad

The Crazies (1973), in which the Proper Authorities enforce Murphy’s Law with an iron fist…

Deranged (1974), in which you just know all the neighbors will tell the folks from the TV news that he always seemed like such a nice, quiet fellow who kept to himself a lot…

Eaten Alive (1976), in which the neighbors are going to get bleeped when the TV news airs their remarks about the culprit…

Future Hunters (1986), in which Sirio Santiago rips off the whole 1980’s in one fell swoop…

The Horror of Party Beach (1964), in which Del Tenney runs with a ball that AIP uncharacteristically dropped…

It (2017), in which a pretty crappy horror movie keeps getting in the way of a pretty great coming-of-age drama…

Lisztomania (1975), after which you’ll never hear anything by Richard Wagner quite the same way again…

She Demons (1958), in which Richard Cunha rips off damn near the whole 1950’s in one fell swoop…

Swamp Thing (1982), in case you forgot how crummy comic book movies used to be…

Wolfguy: Enraged Lycanthrope (1975), in which the wolf-man never turns into a wolf, but somehow that’s kind of okay…

and…

Wonder Women (1973), which I promise you is none of the movies you’re imagining as you read that title.

 
 
 

El Santo rules the wasteland-- and also 1000 Misspent Hours and Counting.

Spy vs. self

The AssignmentBarely released to theaters, The Assignment didn’t deserve its shabby treatment, being an effective action thriller that should be much better known.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.

Fairly awful

All's FairAlthough All’s Fair has an interesting cast of B movie stars, there is nothing else to make the movie particularly worth watching.

Keith Bailey is the proprietor of The Unknown Movies Page.