IT'S ALIVE! The B-Masters are Back from Beyond

It’s been a long, long time… but the B-Masters are finally back in our own website. Like most things brought back to life in the movies, we’re missing a few pieces here and there, but that’s no reason we can’t have our Colin Clive moment of triumph. And what better way to celebrate our resurrection than with a Roundtable — our first in a full year? This time our subject is (appropriately enough) movies about coming back from the dead. IT’S ALIVE! ALIVE! IT’S ALIVE!!

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1000 Misspent Hours Phantasm II There never was an evil undertaker, or a silver sphere, or a goon squad of bonsai zombies, or an interdimensional slave-raiding ring operating out of Morningside Cemetery. And Reggie certainly never blew up his house to save Mike— otherwise, he wouldn’t still be living in it. No, what happened was that Mike went off his nut when his older brother, Jody, died in a car crash mere weeks after the similar deaths of his parents. Okay. But if there’s no Tall Man, then how come the three random graves that Mike digs up at Morningside as soon as he can sneak over there are empty, just as if their supposed occupants had been shrunken and zombiefied? And who the hell is it that now blows up Reggie’s house exactly the way we saw it in the prologue, only with Reggie’s family trapped inside it instead of a pack of monsters?
Revenge in the House of Usher If you get the impression that I’m stalling here, trying to put off having to subject Revenge in the House of Usher to direct analysis, well… I kind of am. When you watch as much Franco as I have now, you learn to recognize when you’re in the presence of a movie that held some personal meaning for him. However, Franco’s most personal work is characterized by a remarkable nonchalance about whether or not the viewer can extract that meaning, or indeed get anything out of the picture at all. I try to do all I can to be fair to such films, but in this case, I’m not even sure what that would mean.
And You Call Yourself a Scientist! Dead of Night (aka Deathdream) So there we have it. Andy is—no, not undead; he is quite firm on that point; he is dead. It just so happens that he is also up and around and walking and talking – and that he needs regular fixes of human blood in order to keep together, well, body, if not exactly body and soul. I’m not sure whether that makes him a vampire or a zombie, or both. Or neither.
Braineater City of the Living Dead You might think that Mary would be a complete wreck after being buried alive, needing therapy for the rest of her life to deal with this terrible trauma. You might also think she’d be the subject of several investigations: by the police, by her doctors… You’d be wrong. In fact, she seems to recover herself completely over tea with Peter and Theresa.
The Unknown Movies Running Delilah Running Delilah was a made-for-TV production produced by the ABC television network. Although the story in the movie manages to stand alone on its own, it is pretty obvious that the events in the movie were a setup for a possible weekly TV series. But apparently the network heads felt in the end that this feature-length pilot was enough, and after watching it for myself, I think the network heads made the right decision.


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