Don’t blame me, blame the people who think that a shoddily-packaged horror DVD is more likely to score a few more sales to shoppers with low standards at Halloween than at any other time.
First up is Lust For Vengeance, which trumpets itself as the “Tenth Anniversary Explicit Version.” None of that decade-long period was spent brushing up on PhotoShop skills. (Comic Sans AND Papyrus? Bold move, sir!)
The next up is Hidden, which answers the pressing question, “What do you do when the only production photos anyone thought to grab and unimpressive, and the wrong dimensions to boot?” Answer: SSTTRREETTCCHH.
For the designer of the “10th Anniversary Special Edition” DVD of The Resurrection Game, the normal trick of compositing multiple headshots with different light sources simply wasn’t enough of a challenge. No, the hurdle he set himself was this: How many different saturations and hues can those photos be in? Extra points for including both monochrome and hand-tinted!
Because House of the Damned comes to us from the same self-distributing auteur as Lust For Vengeance, it is therefore no surprise to us that he thought Comic Sanes was entirely appropriate for cover copy meant to be taken seriously.
#1 by Naomi on October 25, 2011 - 9:14 pm
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I love the facial expression on Ms. Lust For Vengeance. “You guuuuys, I’m trying to pooooop! Stop filming!”
Maybe I’ve seen too many of these and it’s affecting my judgement, but the Hidden cover doesn’t look completely terrible (though I suspect the Confusion Films label is especially apt). And I’m liking the symmetry of the House of the Damned/Damn This House! two-disc set. What’s that? It’s only one movie? The second part is supposed to be a tagline? Never mind.
#2 by RogerBW on October 26, 2011 - 2:25 am
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What possesses someone to choose “Dakeeta Planty” as a stage name? The message it sends to me is “I’m looking for work as a stripper… and I can’t spell”.
I actually quite like the cover of The Resurrection Game, but possibly that’s because I haven’t seen the film; it looks like the cover for an anthology edition of a long-running TV series, something like Doctor Who.
Red text over black-and-white, a classic of readability. But hey, it’s all about the design, man.
#3 by Read MacGuirtose on November 15, 2011 - 6:51 pm
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I kinda like the fact that the covers to both the Sean Weathers films include quotes that… aren’t really complimentary to the film, and give the impression of being taken out of context, lone snips from paragraphs of putdown. I guess no one actually praised the film, so they took what they could get.
(I mean, seriously… all the quote on [i]Lust For Vengeance[/i] says is that the film contains sex, violence, and drugs… it says nothing whatsoever about its quality. And the second quote on [i]House of the Damned[/i] just says that the music is suited to the campiness of the film… it’s not at all obvious that this should be regarded as a good thing.)
#4 by Naomi on November 15, 2011 - 7:02 pm
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Don’t forget, the music “continues for the duration of the film.” That’s the true mark of quality right there.