It’s Roundtable month again, folks! This time around we’re taking a look at prehistory according to the B-movies, at tales of those times back when the earth was populated by Neanderthals, or by barbarians, or by conquerors, or by warrior princesses, or by evil overlords with hokey powers (conveyed by hokier special effects)…or by all of them at once. From cavemen to Conan, from swords to sorcerors, from fur bikinis to chain-mail brassieres, you’ll find it all here!
It’s 10,000 B.S. – all throughout the month of February at the B-Masters’ Blog!
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#1 by Blake on January 31, 2010 - 9:14 am
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I sincerely hope that we get reviews of “A Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell” and more of “Dinosaur Island” this time around.
#2 by The Rev. D.D. on January 31, 2010 - 12:48 pm
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Ooooo, can’t wait to see Ms. Kingsley tear into her choice. As well as everyone else’s reviews, come to think of it.
I wouldn’t mind seeing a review of the former.
#3 by Ed on January 31, 2010 - 10:11 pm
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Ditto, I’m up for someone other than myself suffering through a horrible caveman movie. I recently did a thing on Wild Women of Wongo. Eventually the pain will go away, but the time I spent watching it will never be recovered.
Sure it was the Film Crew version but still!
#4 by MatthewF on February 1, 2010 - 6:39 am
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I’m hoping for Prehistoric Women, in which Hammer fearlessly amortize the investment in plastic rocks and fur bikinis they made for 1 million years BC
#5 by The Rev. D.D. on February 1, 2010 - 7:54 am
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WWoW was pretty silly fun all around, although I wanted to strangle that parrot after his second “humorous” commentary.
Prehistoric Women…I haven’t seen the Hammer one. I have seen the one from the early ’50s, though, and…MAN that one was pain. Except for the “dragon,” which was one of the GREATEST THINGS EVER FILMED.
#6 by Cabal on February 1, 2010 - 9:20 am
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I love it! Any chance of someone giving “Red Sonja” the thorough savaging it deserves? I know it’s not as obscure a film as the Masters usually favor, but any film that puts Ronald Lacey in Mongol headgear is bloody well asking for it…
#7 by Read MacGuirtose on February 1, 2010 - 2:49 pm
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Don’t remember the name of it (though someone here may recognize it), but I remember one marvelously stupid movie I saw on TV once that started by a voiceover proclaiming that it took place in “The Time…. Before The Moon!” This turned out to be a major plot point, as through the course of the movie there were occasional cuts to show the moon forming in the sky (!), and at the climax of the movie the moon finally finished coming together, which instantly caused a giant wave that wiped out all the evil cavemen on the shore while leaving the heroes on a raft a short distance out from shore completely safe and unharmed.
I only saw it once, and it’s been a while, so I may be misremembering some details, but that’s what I recall, anyway. Ring any bells with anyone? (And I don’t suppose anyone actually has this movie on their to-be-reviewed list?)
#8 by Camassia on February 1, 2010 - 3:31 pm
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Red, I think you’re thinking of When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth, which has already been reviewed by El Santo. I stumbled across it on TV some years ago myself, but didn’t make it all the way to the end…
#9 by Read MacGuirtose on February 1, 2010 - 3:40 pm
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Ah, yes, that is indeed it. Actually, I’m pretty sure I’ve read El Santo’s review of it before, and recognized it then as the movie I’d seen years before, but then I apparently forgot about it… hey, with hundreds if not thousands of reviews on the B-Masters’ sites, it’s hard to remember them all. 😉