The B-Masters Cabal

Aaron Spelling produced a staggering number of television shows during the course of the 70’s. His productions included iconic TV series, like “Dynasty”, “Charlie’s Angels”, “Fantasy Island” and “The Love Boat”, as well as some of the best-remembered (if not necessarily the best) TV movies, including Crowhaven Farm, The Daughters of Joshua Cabe and The Boy in the Plastic Bubble . Not everything he touched turned to television gold, but even some of his less successful productions are still memorable (does the phrase “Football — you bet!” ring a bell?).

1978’s Cruise Into Terror is one of the misfires. The script seems like somebody stuffed an issue of the National Enquirer in a blender… but the formidable all-star cast makes the resulting mess much more entertaining than it has any right to be.

A Vacation in Hell (1979)

Of course, the ‘70s were a decade frought with Meaning anyway – new wisdom, new paradigms, discovering one’s self, getting in touch with one’s inner child/mystic/mother-in-law/what have you. What could have been (and was surely meant to be originally) a mildly engaging suspense yarn became a pseudo-drama, painting a picture of societal tensions present in the minds and op-ed columns of the sensitive intelligentsia at the time. Not bad for a Monday Night Movie on ABC.

How good is the suspense thriller Venom? Well, actor Klaus Kinski chose to act in this film instead of taking an offer from Steven Spielberg to appear in Raiders Of The Lost Ark. Though on the other hand, I also found out Kinski made this choice not for artistic reasons, but for financial ones – he was offered more money to appear in Venom. Yet Venom manages to be a very good movie, suspenseful and filled with tension. It also regards its audience as being smart instead of dumb. And with Oliver Reed clashing with Kinski throughout the movie, you know you are going to get your money’s worth from that alone.

No, it’s not more sexual harassment at a comic book convention.  Instead, we take a break from TV movies to watch some Saturday morning TV cartoons.  Come see what happens when the Superfriends find themselves projected into books of classic–not to mention public domain–literature, and face being trapped forever in a FAIRY TALE OF DOOM.

There’s also still time to get in on the debate about which Bennet sister would end up marrying Solomon Grundy, by the way, although Mary seems to be running away with it.

I’m taking a break from the obscure and the unsubtitled, to review one of the best-remembered TV movies of all time:

Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark (1973)

Sure, there are far scarier things on television these days… for instance, I’d rather be locked in a house with three murderous demon-imps than with the cast of any reality TV show. But when it comes to sheer craftsmanship, Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark can withstand comparison to almost any movie on the big or small screen.

It’s AYCYAS! – where too much is never enough!

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Stop me if you’ve heard this one:

The flight-crew and passengers of a commercial airliner are stricken with food poisoning, and the only hope of a safe landing lies in the hands of a helicopter pilot who hasn’t flown in years, after a traumatic experience in Vietnam…

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TERROR IN THE SKY (1971)

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While there’s no question that the 1970s were responsible for many, many embarrassing things, one phenomenon for which the decade has no need to apologise is that of the made-for-television movie. In 1969, the ABC network premiered its Tuesday night Movie Of The Week; and so successful did it prove that not only did ABC expand the program to Tuesday and Saturday, but almost forced the other networks to compete by establishing their own MFTV units, as well as prompting an increase in that sort of production by the major motion picture studios.

However, these little films, known for their professionalism and casts of reliable familiar faces, were no mere filler: many of them could boast a remarkable writing pedigree; quite a number dealt seriously with controversial issues, including alcoholism, drug abuse and homosexuality; although at the same time, there is no doubt that fans of genre fare like horror, science fiction and disaster movies were particularly well served.

But then the 80s arrived, and made the 70s seem less embarrasing by comparison. The time of the MFTVM sputtered to a close. It was, indeed, the end of an era; an era that we at the B-Masters intend to spend a full month celebrating. Join us as we relive the memories…and the nightmares.

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Ghosts of Goldfield (2007) begins with those terribly ominous words, “Based on true events.” That usually means that the filmmakers are preemptively excusing their deficiencies in originality, story coherence, etc., by claiming that they were hampered by the facts. Beyond a few simple historical facts, I can neither confirm nor deny the factual basis of any part of the story presented, but I can say this: If a movie sucks, it sucks, and one can’t use the facts as a defense.

Enchanting Shadow

If you are a fan of A Chinese Ghost Story, or if you simply enjoy a solid supernatural film, there’s a lot to love in Enchanting Shadow. It’s the sort of elegant, artfully crafted sort of film you don’t see much of any more, with an attention to detail that wouldn’t be matched until Chu Yuan started directed wuxia movies for the same studio. Enchanting Shadow is one of the first significant films in the fledgling Hong Kong horror scene and would be worth seeing for historical importance alone. Luckily, it has a lot more to offer the viewer than a mere film history lesson. It’s a beautifully acted, beautifully crafted, genuinely creepy high point in the long tradition of good old fashioned ghost stories.