The Stan Winston directed movie A Gnome Named Gnorm is an especially moronic and annoying comedy that’s understandably unknown.
It left me gnumb
Dec 9
Hollywood Nightmare
Dec 8
Mulholland Drive is my favorite film from one of my favorite directors. It’s a film that rewards the dedicated viewer. First, by confusing them and making one think about what the hell is going on. Later, once you have figured out the structure of the film and what the second half means to the first, there is still so much the film has to offer. It’s culmination of all of David Lynch’s sundry obsessions and themes, a tragic tale of the Hollywood meat grinder as filtered through the lens of nostalgia and affection for that very same meat grinder.
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Keith Allison is the chief Bacchanologist at Teleport City.
Some of you may have noticed that I sort of have a thing for the Cold War. So does the guy who writes Checkpoint Telstar. Consequently, I thought of him immediately when I realized it was the 25th anniversary of the revolution in East Germany which signaled the end of that era, and we put together a little bilateral roundtable-like thingy to celebrate:
Then I also reviewed a couple movies that don’t fit with the main program:
Double Dragon (1994), in which a nominal adaptation of an early chopsocky video game goes in peculiar directions indeed…
and…
Unknown World (1951), in which a journey to the center of the Earth goes nowhere at all.
2014 is not only the Cabal’s 15th Anniversary. It’s also mine, at Braineater.com. To celebrate my own site’s Anniversary, I’ve decided to review one of my favorite Italian horror films. And for my Roundtable entry, my Anniversary-themed flick, I’m going with the Bollywood remake of that same Italian horror film.
First up, there’s Lucio Fulci’s 1977 giallo Sette Note in Nero (Seven Notes in Black), also known as The Psychic. Since it’s nominally a mystery, I’ve done two entirely different reviews for this movie: one without spoilers and one with LOTS of spoilers. The first review is ridiculously short, and the second is ridiculously long. You might want to read them both: even though it’s a murder mystery, Sette Note is not the sort of film that loses its interest when you know what’s going to happen in the end.
In any case, I recommend you read at least one of them before proceeding to my Roundtable entry: 100 Days (1991), the Indian version of Fulci’s film.
I’ll give you a moment to let that sink in: Bollywood Fulci… with singing and dancing. But don’t get any ideas about a Ziegfeld Zombie or Busby Berkeley’s Beyond. 100 Days is a surprisingly entertaining thriller, in which an anniversary brings with it a cruel twist of fate. Given a choice between the two films, I much prefer original; but then, I am not the target audience for 100 Days. All things considered, this total re-interpretation of Sette Note in Nero is a great example of how to make an authentic local version of a movie without simply going through the motions.
(That said, though, you’ll certainly see things in 100 Days you’d never expect to see in a giallo…)
Ho ho homicide
Nov 30
Surprisingly funny and well produced, Santa’s Slay may be the best horror movie made concerning a killer Santa Claus.
Ah, were we ever so young?
I know what you’re thinking. What a timely review!! But sometimes you want to examine something obscure that no one’s ever heard of.
In this film, there’s a event that horrifies everyone who witnesses it, or even just hears about it. People then tell themselves it’s over and try to get on with their lives. But then, 15 years later, it happens again. I don’t know why, that just seems to speak to me right now.
It’s the scariest and most horrifying Michael Myers this side of the one in The Love Guru, as we learn what awaits the unwary on Halloween.
You can’t go home again…
Nov 22
…or at least, you probably shouldn’t.
Not if “home” is a small town.
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This Roundtable has been a good excuse to give a couple of older reviews a makeover:
[NB: No nudity, but possibly NSFW anyway. {You heard me: two slasher films with no nudity. What is the world coming to..?}]
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Twenty-one years after a mining disaster, and twenty years after the sole survivor of that disaster went on a murderous rampage, the small town of Valentine Bluffs decides to revive its annual Valentine’s Day Dance, not held since the time of the tragedy.
Big mistake…
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I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER (1997)
A year after their attempt to cover up hitting someone with their car turns into murder, four friends reunite in the small town of Southport, North Carolina.
Big mistake…
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Liz Kingsley is the insane genius behind And You Call Yourself a Scientist!Corman crime conspiracy
Nov 20
The 1995 Roger Corman production Dillinger And Capone has a great premise: What if bank robber John Dillinger crossed paths with mob boss Al Capone? But as for the end results… well, it is a 1990s Roger Corman production after all, though somewhat better than most.
A League of Their Own
Nov 19
Admittedly, I might be stretching the concept behind our 15th anniversary theme beyond the breaking point…but come on! A gang of wisecracking soldiers unite to pull of one big heist? It seemed appropriate at the time. Anyway, on with the heist!
LEAGUE OF GENTLEMEN
League of Gentlemen begins with a scene that seems like it should have come from a German krimi film based on the lunatic mystery novels of Edgar Wallace. A well-dressed man in smart evening wear emerges from a manhole somewhere on one of the steamy streets of London then proceeds to enter a waiting Rolls Royce. He drives himself home and then sets about the task of writing seven letters. Each of these he places in a parcel alongside an American potboiler novel called The Golden Fleece, ten half-£5-notes, and an invitation to lunch at the Cafe Royal.
Keith Allison is the chief Bacchanologist at Teleport City.
Those bloody kids…
Nov 10
The movie Bloody Birthday is an above average take on the not that often used “killer kid” movie genre.