.
As it turns out, a balloon on wires with stuck-on googly eyes. Bet they didn’t tell you that in anatomy class..
THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS (1957)
In which a “recognised nuclear scientist” is taken over by a giant transparent floating space brain, and immediately starts making plans for world domination. He also turns into a ravening sex-maniac.
Hmm…is it just me, or is a pattern starting to emerge in the reviews I’m resurrecting?
.
Liz Kingsley is the insane genius behind And You Call Yourself a Scientist!
#1 by lyzard on August 31, 2013 - 1:35 am
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If I’ve learned anything over the past few weeks, it’s that I have very old-fashioned ideas about what constitutes a “product description”. It seems to me to be ridiculously difficult to know what any given electronic device can actually do, based upon the information provided by the people who want you to give them money for it.
I took my best guess, and though I didn’t quite guess right, close enough: I ended up with a device that I didn’t actually want or need, but which allowed me access to the device I did want and need.
Should it be this hard to play a fricking DVD? Really?
Anyway…I now have access to R1 DVDs again. Which means I’m out of excuses.
Eep!
#2 by The Rev. on August 31, 2013 - 5:21 am
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Did you just explicate what the pattern is, or do I have to think about this further?
(I’m hoping it’s the former, because I fear the latter will be blindingly obvious and I’ll remain oblivious and just end up embarrassed.)
#3 by lyzard on August 31, 2013 - 5:37 am
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YES!! You have to THINK!! Mwoo-ha-ha-ha!!
Uh, no, not really: after writing “He also turns into a ravening sex-maniac” I noticed that I had described Reefer Madness as being about drugs “turn[ing] clean-cut young Americans into sex-crazed drug fiends”, and began to worry about what was going on in my subconscious… 🙂
#4 by Naomi on August 31, 2013 - 2:36 pm
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Of course, as a scientist, you know that a mere two data points do not a pattern make. (Unless you perhaps omitted an entire plot thread from your review of It’s Alive…)
My goodness, that poster at the end is hideous. I can see why you buried it there, but I would have rejected it based on the kerning alone.
#5 by Jen S on August 31, 2013 - 4:59 pm
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Now, now, I’m sure your subconscious was just reacting to the terrible grammar of the poster. “It’s!”
This review reminds me, I never did start that band and name it Fissure of Rolondo.
#6 by The Rev. on September 2, 2013 - 2:49 pm
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Holy crap, I actually had a thought along those lines but dismissed it for some reason.
Well dammit.
#7 by lyzard on August 31, 2013 - 8:37 pm
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I said a pattern was starting to emerge. We’ll have to see what comes out of the hat next. 🙂
It was, however, the grammatical error rather than the artistic sins that earned my ire.
At least The Cramps got the job half-done, Jen!
#8 by ronald on September 1, 2013 - 11:08 am
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Well, remember, Steve started his 1950s scientific career as Prof. Clete Ferguson and ended it as Major Bruce Jay, so he probably didn’t have much trouble establishing a new identity for himself to escape the consequences of Gor’s crimes. 🙂
As for the axe, well, Sherlock Holmes kept his unanswered correspondence pinned to the mantlepiece with a jack-knife. One must make allowances for genius…or reasonable facsimiles thereof…
#9 by lyzard on September 2, 2013 - 11:31 pm
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For a reasonable facsimile, I would! 🙂
#10 by RogerBW on September 1, 2013 - 12:46 pm
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It’s just one pith helmet, but it is able to bilocate through quantum look over there.
The marriage thing reminds me of the first Flash Gordon serial, where Ming the Merciless clearly intends to ravish Dale… but insists on marrying her first. He’s not a monster, you know!
Yeah, it’s meant to be that hard to play a DVD that hasn’t been published in your synthetically-isolated market. Because you must be a greedy evil pirate for wanting it.
#11 by Ken on September 1, 2013 - 11:08 pm
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In fairness, this was back when people packed picnic lunches and headed into the mountains north of Las Vegas to watch the mushroom clouds. And you could get proper radium dials for your watch.
#12 by lyzard on September 2, 2013 - 11:29 pm
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That’s right! I’m getting rich by watching an R1 disc of The Brain From Planet Arous!
If only. Sigh.
The stupid thing is our actual DVD-playing devices ignored the region-coding from the start; it’s only our computers that seem hysterical about it.
…*shudder*…
Even so, I’d like to think a recognised nuclear scientist would know a little better. 🙂
#13 by Richard on September 3, 2013 - 1:51 am
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I’m wondering if a remake of “Arous” would be worthwhile. It’s the philosophical debate at the core of the story: Is it an acceptable exchange to subject the entire human race to what is essentially slavery in order to gain centuries of scientific and technical advancement in the course of just a few years?
If Gor is going to be an absolute dictator, that means total domination of over six billion people, 24/7. Can he really do that? Not only will he be directing our scientists and engineers, he will also have to make sure that the DMV office in Beulah, ND, has enough copies of Form MV-15…
#14 by lyzard on September 4, 2013 - 11:47 pm
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I don’t think this situation constitutes mankind gaining “centuries of scientific and technical advancement” – sure, Gor promises to give the planet back, but considering the state it’s likely to be in when he’s taken all the resources he needs, I think a sarcastic “Gosh, thanks!” is in order.
On the other hand, Gor is just sadist enough to take the DMV to his heart.
#15 by ronald on September 3, 2013 - 5:06 am
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>>>I’m wondering if a remake of “Arous” would be worthwhile
Have you noticed the number and quality of movies that have been re-made over the past few years? What does “worthwhile” have to do with anything? :-/
#16 by Richard on September 5, 2013 - 1:55 pm
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What if it was done as a comedy?
“Good Morning, Lord. Here’s the schedule for today. First, you meet with a delegation from Israel; they want your support for their settlement program. Then, there’s a group from the Palestinian Authority; they want you to stop the settlement program. Then you are to do a “meet and greet” with a group of schoolchildren. You have a lunchtime conference with your engineers; they want you to sign off on the latest modifications to the plans for your flagship. Speaking of which, the scientists need you to clarify the physics behind the flux dynamotron…”
#17 by Richard on September 5, 2013 - 2:35 pm
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“With all due respect, sir, that would make it three science teams that you will have executed this month alone. At this rate, we’ll be relying on high school teachers before the year is out…”
#18 by blake on September 3, 2013 - 4:49 pm
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You know, a lot of people consider Morris Ankrum to be one of the quintessential 50s sci-fi actors, but I’ve always been a bigger fan of Thomas Browne Henry.
#19 by lyzard on September 4, 2013 - 11:48 pm
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Do we have to choose? True, Morrie and his general’s uniform will always say “50s SF” to me, but there’s plenty of room for both of them.