The B-Masters Cabal

Silents and more at 1000 Misspent Hours and Counting :

The Airship Destroyer (1909), in which Great Britain’s answer to Georges Melies predicts the military applications of powered flight with eerie accuracy…

American Psycho 2 (2002), in which a bid to turn one of the more pointed satires of the last ten years into a long-running horror franchise meets with all the success that such a project deserves…

Black Mama, White Mama (1973), in which Margaret Markov and Pam Grier look way better in matching, ass-length prison smocks than Tony Curtis and Sidney Poitier were ever going to…

J’Accuse! (1919), in which a ponderous wartime soap opera ducks into the nearest phone booth, and comes out wearing something even more surprising than tights and a cape…

Scream, Blacula, Scream (1973), in which American International achieves the seemingly impossible a second time…

and…

Weird Tales (1919), the forgotten great-grandpappy of everything from Dead of Night to Tales from the Dark Side: The Movie.

 A little fin de siècle science fiction, from the great-granddaddy of the  fantasy film:

 LE VOYAGE DANS LA LUNE (1902)

 À LA CONQUÊTE DU PÔLE (1912)

WHITE HELL OF PIZ PALU
Mountain adventure films have come and gone since then, and most of the movement has been toward the goofy and embarrassing. Arnold Fanck is really where this type of adventure begins, though, and even if his became a largely forgotten name, his adventure films still stand as some of the best ever made, and his combination of documentary and drama informs many modern films. His camera studies the mountain intently, dwells on the natural wonders such behemoths generate: the dance of cloud shadows over snow fields and rags, the glistening tunnels and pits of ice fields, the bizarre swirls of powder kicked up by winds cascading over the peaks. One gets a feel for every nook and cranny, every nub, jug, and crimpy little handhold. And that helps us understand the pain of the characters as they toil up the spine of this beast. Unencumbered by the modern thirst for special effects, madcap editing, and overblown theatrics, Fanck simply lets the mountain be a mountain, and the end result is both hypnotic and scary. It’s going to brutalize you, probably even kill you. But you can’t stop yourself from going anyway.

Coolest thing ever!  Chicago’s Portage Theater on Saturday, Aug 23rd will be showing THREE classic big bug movies.

5:45  PM  Beginning of the End Going in reverse quality order, I see.  Bert I. Gordon’s classic tale of the giant grasshoppers that ate Chicago.  See!  Giant monsters walk off buildings and onto open air!  See!  The mountains that define the Midwest!  See!  Peter Graves wonder why his brother was in The Thing from Another World and Them!, and he was in this and Killers from Space! 

7:45 PM  The Black Scorpion  Willis “King Kong” O’Brien did the awesome stop-motion effects for this flick, and that’s ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW!!

9:45 PM  Them!  What’s that?!  My favorite monster movie of all time, PLAYING ON A HUGE THEATER SCREEN?!  I’m so there!!

Also at the Portage this month, Creature of the Black Lagoon plays this Saturday night, with Creature portrayer Ricou Browning signing autographs!

Fans of schlock, meanwhile, will want to check out the mini-marathon run at the theater on Aug 16th, featuring The Hills Have Eyes (the real one), The Tingler, The Deadly Spawn, Slumber Party Massacre, Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer, Machine Girl, and a documentary on William Castle.  All for $17!!

One more to squeeze in before we post our silent film round table review.

TERRIFYING GIRLS HIGH SCHOOL: LYNCH LAW CLASSROOM
Man, the Japanese sure used to know how to title a movie, didn’t they? There’s no escaping the fact that Terrifying Girls’ High School: Lynch Law Classroom is one nasty little beast, and I have never been more serious in saying that a film is not for everyone than I am in this case. There is, however, the possibility that some viewers might even get a secret thrill out of hating it, and decrying it for all of the many things it contains that are vile and offensive. Me, I like it. Sure, it has a sleaziness that prevents it from completely rising above its tawdry skinflick roots, but it also has a genuinely feral quality that goes way beyond the bounds of typical exploitation fare. And the intermittent flashes of beauty that it contains only serve to further spotlight that convulsive wildness.

It’s time for another B-Masters’ Roundtable! Drop in throughout the month of August as we celebrate the dawn of cinema, the time when a picture truly was worth a thousand words.

It’s SHHHHHH: A Silent Movie Spectacular

This month at the B-Masters’ Blog!

Felidae
The German-made animated feature Felidae has, at least at first glance, the slick commercial look of the type of Hollywood productions we’re used to seeing from the likes of Disney and Don Bluth. If you’re anything like me, that might prove to be a bit of a stumbling block, because, being that I’m no big fan of mainstream animation, that’s not the type of cinematic experience I tend to seek out. And indeed, during its first few minutes I had some serious doubts about whether I was going to enjoy Felidae. Then came the moment when the film’s protagonist, a feline detective by the name of Francis, stumbles across his first horribly mutilated kitty corpse, and I quickly realized that there were quite a few shades of difference between Felidae and Fievel Goes West.

The following is from a press release for the Second Annual B Movie Celebration, September 26th thru 28th, 2008. (Looks like they could have used a copy editor, but…)

*****

The Celebration will feature screenings of over 50 classic B movies, 20 Educational seminars and the World’s Largest Beach Party, featuring the music of The Moon-Rays. And we really need your help getting the word out.

The Celebration will feature screenings of over 50 classic B movies, Many in glorious 35mm. Our Line Up, which has been curated by B Movie Legend Jim Wynorski. The films includes:

SHOGUN ASSASSIN
FORBIDDEN WORLD
DEATH RACE 2000
HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD
THIS ISLAND EARTH
TARANTULA
CARNIVAL OF SOULS
NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD
NIGHT OF THE COMET
BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS
THE GIANT BEHEMOTH
QUEEN OF OUTER SPACE
WORLD WITHOUT END
RUSS MEYER’S UP
FROM HELL IT CAME
ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS
NOT OF THIS EARTH(the black and white original)
THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS
THE 7TH VOYAGE OF SINBAD
EARTH VS. THE FLYING SAUCERS
WITHOUT WARNING
SCREWBALLS
GALAXY OF TERROR
HOUSE
THE CRAWLING EYE
ATTACK OF THE 50FOOT WOMAN
PSYCHO
JOURNEY TO THE SEVENTH PLANET
INVISIBLE INVADERS
ATTACK OF THE GIANT LEECHES
TERMINAL ISLAND
NIGHTHAWKS
MYSTERIOUS ISLAND(61)
ONE MILLION B.C.
INVADERS FROM MARS(53)
TO TRAP A SPY
HOLD THAT GHOST
ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN
TWINS OF EVIL
THE VAMPIRE LOVERS
LUST FOR A VAMPIRE
THE TIME MACHINE
WAR OF THE WORLDS

Plus The First Edition of Summer TromaDance

A Lifetime Achievement Award to Stuart Gordon
From his 1985 debut as a cult director with Re-Animator to his 2002 H.P. Lovecraft film “Dagon” Stuart Gordon has consistently delivered quality horror to the masses, and is now considered by many of us to be one of the most important exploitation film-makers of the past 30 years.

Other great guests
Tom Savini, Jim Wynorski (of course), Conrad Brooks from Plan Nine From Outer Space , Tom Holland Director of Fright Night, Andrew Stevens Producer, Independent Horror Director Jim O’Rear and many many more.

The Best Hosts, Mister Lobo, Queen of Trash, Will The Thrill, Monic Tiki Goddess

The World’s Largest Beach Party With the Moon-rays
The planets greatest B- Movie surf band will turn this small Mid Western City into a rockin Hepcat beach party. The Moon Rays were born of a concept brought on by the recording of the theme from WGN’s Creature Features TV show andf the rest is legend. Join them in Franklin Indiana September 27th as we see summer out with a bang,

For more information
For further information please go to www.bmoviecelebration.com